"I wish I could be like Krystina"

Okay, first I was just perplexed as to why my name was in the Urban Dictonary site. Then I looked at the meanings. Yeah, cause your name might mean consecrated to God but mine means "a kick ass pimptress who enjoys talking about fisting and vaginas, watching gay sex and a person who all males want to pleasure."

Because that is just so me in a nutshell, no?

Ah, the hilarity.

I made salsa last night and it's really quite good, I had a few bites. Then again, I don't suppose it's that hard to dice up tomatoes and onions (or let your boyfriend attempt to go at them with the hand chopper and find that it doesn't totally get the skin off and makes his work shirt really dirty) and throw it in a bowl with the spices. But still, it's healthier and cheaper than the store bought crap, right? Right. Now I must veer off into extremely (and I mean extremely) unhealthy and still cheap territory.

Alfredo sauce.

Gawd. Two teaspoons of olive oil, a plastic spoonful of butter, some garlic, a block of cream cheese (none of that lite or fat-free crap either, it won't taste nearly as good), half a cup of milk and lots of pepper and garlic salt turned into heaven in just 10 minutes. I threw it all into the frying pan, let it melt on a medium heat and then ate it over some linguine pasta that I bought for a 1.00 the other day. Since it came out so damn well, I decided that it shall also be dinner tonight. I'm going to add some diced up chicken breast and frozen spinach as well and have a sort of Alfredo chicken Florentine. I'm drooling already. Dinner last night was pretty good, Mom went all out and cooked two huge platters of boiled potatoes and two platters of corned beef brisket (aren't we so proud that I now know that BBQ beef brisket and corned beef are the same cut of meat? Yeah, didn't think so) plus a head of cabbage and carrots (cooked separately so the S/O wouldn't object) and cheesecake with strawberries and whipped cream for dessert. She didn't make the soda bread this year because she doesn't like it and felt that if she wasn't going to eat it, why make it? A woman after my own heart, that mother of mine. We were sent home with leftover cheesecake (two slices), a head of lettuce and some tomatoes that she had leftover from what she'd bought at Sam's Club and an onion for my salsa. The better half of the evening after dinner was spent lavishing the dogs (well, dog, mostly Toto) with attention and attempting to get the dog to take her pill without a piece of cheese (with no luck - as I stood gloating that I got her to take it, she promptly spit it out and everyone started laughing and pointing) and whining that I wished I could take the dog home (and I can! Saturday, I'm having her for all weekend). Then we hit up the taqueria joint by Mom's house for horchata since the S/O is still thrilled with the idea that we have quite the Mexican community in Chicagoland and there are taqueria's on every other corner where you can get a decent taco and a glass of horchata for under 3 bucks. After that it was Dominick's where I got more cream cheese for a buck a block and more tomatoes for salsa. Since the alfredo sauce came out so damn good, I'm thinking I may need to start buying more cream cheese. One of these days I'll invest in a good springform pan and go to work on making a decent cheese cake. Plus someday soon I'm going to buy those gnocchi that you can stuff yourself and try it with goat cheese and a white sauce. I think that'd taste pretty damn divine.

I may need to get a gym membership if I keep cooking like this. I won't be able to get into the DOOR of the fitness center here in the apartments. But hell, at least I'll die knowing I enjoyed the finer things in life and in the end, that's a pretty big thing on my list. On that note, I think the painkiller is doing it's job (looooong story, I was temporary paralyzed yesterday, some of you that I've talked to might remember the story, if not, I'm saving it for another day, anyway, mucho need for the painkillers now) and there is a Frosty in the freezer with my name on it. Plus the cat keeps jumping on my lap and I'd rather be lavishing him with attention than sitting in front of this computer any longer.

before & after