I really want some meatloaf. Except it's 88 degrees outside right now with 60% humidity so I really don't think that's meatloaf weather. Nope, so instead it's probably going to be a pizza night. I really do feel like cooking, to the point that I want to go to the store and get only the stuff I need. I'm not like that normally, my shopping method (I bet I get a google for that) is more of the go in and buy stuff for meals for a week or so and also any other little things you're gonna need. But yeah, it's just too damn hot and I had this idea that maybe I'd make some lamb, you know, ground lamb rolled up in tortillas or little balls and then a nice cold yogurt sauce and then avocado salad except, well, this is Alabama, people. You can't find lamb in just any ol' grocery store like you would in say, Chicago or LA or even New Orleans or Nashville. No. You have to search for it. Sam's Club might have it but that's a pretty big might. Then, well, the avocado salad idea - it'd be nice if avocados weren't almost two god damn dollars EACH. So eh, that blew that idea. Pizza it is.

So, before I move onto not such good news, an amusing story. You all know that I work for super big corporate company providing (mediocre) technical support for DSL customers. Well, at least I thought you did. If you didn't, now you do. So yesterday, the phone beeps (remember, they beep at work) in my ear and I provide my oh-so-charming introductory greeting - "Thank you for calling insert-name-of-company-here Online Technical Support, this is Nina speaking, may I verify that your insert-name-of-company-here DSL account phone number is insert-phone-number-that-shows-up-on-my-screen-here?". So this man says "Uh, well, no, actually, it's 555-555-5555" (obviously generic number here, people... I'm not giving out the real one). I input that number into my account management tool and it comes up with nada. I inform him of this and so he tells me that they have "quite a few phone lines" and he can't remember which one is the one the account is under. So I ask if he can provide me with the name that the account is under and I'll search that way. So he gives me a woman's name and then a man's name. The man's name is the exact same as a certain actor. "How cute", I say, "just like the actor". "Yeah, something like that", he tells me. So I look it up and lo and behold, there it is, the account. I check the address and it's an LA address (a very upscale area, too). Lex was sitting next to me so I pull her over and say "Aye, I have insert-name-of-actor-here on my phone". "No way!". "Yes!". "Ask him!" "No, I can't". So our old trainer is walking by as we're fighting about this and we check the notes in his account and he had a billing matter anyway so the trainer suggests we contact billing and they can verify if this is truly who it's supposed to be. I call em and they verify that it indeed aforementioned certain actor. I come back to the line and ask him what operating system he's using. "Uhh.. what's that?". Ha. "Sir, click on your Start button and then tell me what version of Windows you're using", assuming he was using Windows since I'm Windows support and you have to select the option "I am a Windows user" in order to get to me. "Uh, I don't see a Start button". "Mr insert-name-of-actor-here, what type of computer are you using?". "Nina, are you able to hold for a minute?" "Sure...". He puts me on hold for two or three minutes, comes back and CONFERENCES his personal assistant who informs me he's using a Mac. "Oh, all right sir, what I'll have to do is get you on over to our Mac tech support department". But before I transferred, I asked very nicely "So, you're insert-name-of-actor-here in the movies, huh?". He informed that he was and then burst out with a catchphrase from the movie that made him a household name and then started talking about his new movie. Oh yeah, and while we were waiting for Mac support to pick up, he asked where I was located. I told him I was in Alabama and I got informed by Mister Celebrity that I do NOT sound like I'm from Alabama. Take that, suckers.

Dad's results came back. He has unexplained blood clots in the brain but because they're so small, they're hoping that instead of draining them, they can keep him on medication and that'll treat them. Then, last night around 8-ish, I call Mom to check on him since he'd been sleeping all day and has been depressed (go figure). She tells me they're taking him to the hospital per the doctor's orders and hooking him up to a heart monitor for observation. Ugh. I just don't know. What really sucks the big one about this is the only person that can understand and make me feel better that isn't an online person is the person I live with. Fine, okay, that's great except I hate having to depend on just one person to be, for lack of a better word, babied (maybe comforted?) by. There should be more people to go to, to whine to, to rant to, to cry to. Of course, I could just not say anything at all and believe me, I'm trying, but in a way, that's not right either. Of course, I'm flattering myself by thinking it matters if anything is right or not right in this world. Oh and people who say or are going to say "well, that is their (the significant other's) job" are full of shit. There is no job when it comes to relationships. You do shit because you love somebody, not because you feel obliged to. Although something I've learned in the past few years is you do have to ask, you cannot just expect someone to read your mind and know that you're upset and need a shoulder to cry on. Of course learning it and applying it to life are two different things but hey, it's a start. Anyway, I don't know if I'm being way too dramatic or way too apathetic about it all. I mean, the man wasn't a saint while I was growing up but he still doesn't deserve any of this and neither does my brother. My mother, well, she's a different story but christ, I think I'm confused about the father thing... let's not even get started about the mother thing.

So the lady never called. I didn't get the job. Three goddamn interviews for nothing. Mind you, if the interviews hadn't been at 9 am in the sweltering Alafreakingbama heat, it might've been a little bit better. But no. Then to add gasoline to the fire, they make you walk down three flights of stairs to get to the elevator then walk again (in the 85 + degree weather) two blocks to get to the Human Resources center. Now I'm not one to normally complain about walking and anyone that knows me can attest to that. However, when I'm dressed up in my freakin' interview clothes with a full face of makeup, I'm bound to complain just a little. But anyway, I called a few other places today and a few weren't there so I left voicemail's and one even offered me an interview but I was bold and I went ahead and asked "what is your starting pay" and declined the interview offer when they informed me it was seven dollars an hour. Bah, I tell you. This entry has been kind of depressing except for the whole famous person story. Sorry.

before & after